MC Jelly D

Everybody who can appreciate why freestyle rap battling is the ultimate test of verbal intelligence needs to hit this link harder than a diamond. (Hat tip: Muffin.) Although it's been a while since I rocked the mic, I have been doing a small amount of freestyling at the store with one of my co-workers, and I really have no choice but to remember rum-soaked nights in Rand freestyling with my suite-mates over that absurd Snoop beat track. Word to all my Up North People, and full props to all the Row Thugs all across America. Fo sho.

Note: the link is not entirely work safe, but is most definitely sweet. I think you know what to do.

Biopics

In the last seven days, I have seen two excellent biographical movies. Both were about musicians, and both shed light on their lives in ways that I hadn't considered. I'm not as big a fan of the biopic genre as The Madame is, but I do enjoy a good one now and then, and every time I see one, I wonder why Americans love these movies so much. It can't be because they're usually well-made and well-performed films, because Americans also love movies like Starship Troopers (where Denise Richards does not get naked, no matter what you've heard). But I think I have the solution.

I think Americans love biopics because it works against that most dangerous undercurrent in American society: latent Calvinism. We want to believe that celebrities are what they are because they are somehow Elect, that they have something about them that makes them rise above everyone else and become rich and famous. Most Americans have moved past consciously believing that this happens because they are favored by God and destined to go to heaven, but Americans still can't help but feel like fame is evidence of being Elect.

So even though we think this -- way down, deep inside in our collective memory -- we always hope it's not really true, because if being famous is a sign of being Elect, then most of us are screwed and might as well dance on the ceiling with the Devil and Goody Proctor. The reason we like biopics is because it shows us that, whether these celebrities are Elect or not, they're regular people too. Johnny Cash and June Carter fish up at the crick in their spare time. Ray Charles can't help but father children while he's out on the road away from his family. Surely, if these people were Elect, they wouldn't do things like that?

And, incidentally, this is why biopics like Man on the Moon don't do well: they show people who may or may not have been famous enough to be considered Elect acting like people who are Elect. Saintly biopics fail because they don't help us see that the subject had serious issues. And yes, everybody should see Ray and Walk the Line. They're excellent.